Tuesday, June 21, 2011

GTA IV: The Lost and Damned with Good Ol' Jim Beam

I'm a cowboy/ On a steel horse I ride/ And I'm wanted (wanted!)/ Dead or alive.
~ John Francis Bongiovi, Jr.

The words transcribed above not only evoke feelings that I have felt all too powerfully while filling the shoes of Johnny Klebitz, anti-hero of Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned, but they are indeed also found in a song that is included in the game's soundtrack. Riding around Liberty City on a chopper, listening to motorcycle-relevant songs and sipping whiskey makes a lot of sense. I'll earnestly disclaim that drunken driving is disgusting and terribly irresponsible. But whipping around the most beautifully-rendered virtual city that I've ever seen while loaded off straight cheap whiskey is really fun.

The first of the two GTA IV expansions has been decent thus far. Our hero, Johnny, is not as interesting or as sympathetic as Niko Bellic, the star of the original. But it's hard to go wrong with a biker-gang theme in the world of Grand Theft Auto. I won't waste our time over-analyzing the game, or even this pairing. Jack Daniels seems like something that the violent criminals in this game might drink, but due to a bad experience I had at a young age, and also due to my possession of taste buds, I'm not about to spend my money on that monstrosity.

No, a situation like this called for Good Ol' Jim Beam. Known for being the official whiskey of The Bomb Sawyers, it's also a great pairing for games involving motorcycle gangs. Playing GTA IV sober, I sometimes feel sad when I accidentally maim pedestrians or shoot dozens of innocent bystanders. Drinking straight Kentucky Bourbon, with it's hot honey-vanilla goodness, gives me the peace of mind to keep on going, regardless of the civilian death toll.

I'm looking forward to the second GTA IV expansion game: The Ballad of Gay Tony. I swear I'm going to get to my Tony Hawk/Pinot Grigio pairing soon. And there's still my Faxanadu/Mead pairing and Portal 2/Night Train pairings to look forward to. God help me.


  1. Oh yeah GTA IV is one of the best when it comes to graphics and story line. Especially the quest part of it when gonna beat some thugs!

  2. 'Lost and Damned' was a nice atmospheric Liberty City story. 'Ballad of Gay Tony' wasn't as moving or tragic a story, but it was ultimately more fun and had more bells and whistles to keep you interested.

    I really compliment Rock* on making their GTA add-ins such unique role-playing experiences. When I played as Johnny, I rode bikes everywhere and only listened to the classic rock and hardcore stations. When I played Luis in 'Gay Tony', I drove sports cars and listened to nothing but San Juan sounds and 80s new wave. It just felt right for the characters.